Spiritual Sharing March 2006
Spiritual Sharing March 2006
Fri 20060224 Corinthians 3, 1-6
"Unlike other people, we need no letters of recommendation either to you or from you, because you are yourselves our letter, written in our hearts, that anybody can see and read, and it is plain that you are a letter from Christ, drawn up by us, and written not with ink but with the Spirit of the living God, not on stone tablets but on the tablets of your living hearts".
* My dearest Lord, your presentation letter is your love. Love that moves my heart. When my heart gets moved, I know who You are and I don't need any recommendation letter.
Psalm 102.
"My soul, give thanks to the Lord,
all my being, bless his holy name.
My soul, give thanks to the Lord
and never forget all his blessings.
It is he who forgives all your guilt,
who heals every one of your ills,
who redeems your life from the grave,
who crowns you with love and compassion".
Thu 20060216
* "Tell me, my Lord, who You are so that I may believe in You".
Fri 20060210
*
"In painful state, prayer becomes true and strong, though bleak like sand.
Soul speaks to the Lord with her humbleness, with her pain; even more, with her unableness.
Words become scarce, naked. Silence is reached, a step forward into prayer; for silence has no limits whereas every word has limits".
From Letters in the desert by Carlo Caretto.
* Having a hard time at work. I cannot manage well my priorities. My work seems slow, even useless. Let all this mean something to me. Let me hear what You want to say with this. "My heart is not proud, nor haughty my eyes. I didn't go after things too great, nor marvels beyond me".
Thu 20060209.
* My dearest Lord, the other day I said what I thought about something at work and some people got offended. My intention was by no means to offend. I talked to these people afterwards expressing what I wanted to say and asking for excuses if anyone had got offended.
* Let me not care about what others think about me. There's only one I should care for. That's my dearest Lord. I did what I had to do and there's not any more that I can do. Let me not care about what others think.
Mon 20060206
* Yesterday I had to do some shopping and I could not go to my regular mass. I went to my old parish instead. The time was convenient and I was near. There were not many people (as it used to be when I was there). I saw a few known people.
* About encountering Exxx. He came over me and I joined him and his mother. Exxx is a simple person who belonged to my group.
* I became very emotional in this mass. I think it was mainly about the presence of Exxx by my side. About the readings: "I do not boast of preaching the gospel, since it is a duty which has been laid on me" (Co 9,16-19). May my Lord never allow me to boast or take ownership of preaching the gospel.
* On Saturday, the coordinator of the Commission of Religious Affairs told us that one of the auxiliary bishops in our province wanted to get to know our group. Maybe it was because of my little talk. A priest gave it to the bishop last week. However, I don't want to think that it was the talk. Or maybe it was. I don't want to take ownership of what is only from my dearest Lord. That talk is not mine. It is His.
* After the mass Exxx joined me to go and see some other friends. Of how I was thinking of inviting him to do that for weeks but never found the right moment to do it. Yesterday, it was so spontaneous. I loved it.
Wed 20060201
Corinthians 9,16-19
"I do not boast of preaching the gospel, since it is a duty which has been laid on me; I should be punished if I did not preach it!. If I had chosen this work myself, I might have been paid for it, but as I have not, it is a responsibility which has been put into my hands".
Mon 20060130
* My dearest Lord, I pray for Cxxx. She sent me her experience of encountering You from the perspective of the acceptance of her illness.
"Me siento feliz al decir estas palabras: 'Tú eres mi Dios; en tus manos están mis azares'. Se me quita un peso de encima, descanso y sonrío en medio de un mundo difícil. 'Mis azares están en tus manos'. Benditas manos. ¿y cómo he de volver a dudar, a preocuparme, a acongojarme pensando en mi vida y en mi futuro, cuando sé que están en tus manos?. Alegría de alegrías, Señor y favor de favores".
Cxxx
"I feel happy when I say these words: 'You are my God; in your hands are my chances'. A big weight gets out of me, I rest and smile in the middle of a difficult world. 'My chances are in Your hands'. Blessed hands, and how should I worry, get scared thinking of my life, my future, when I know that they are in Your hands?. Joy of every joy, Lord, support of every support".
Cxxx
Wed 20060111
* "Mon âme se repose en paix sûr
Dieu seule".
* My soul rests peacefully on God only.
Thu 20060126
"Pourquoi aller vivre à quelques-uns dans de telles conditions et y rester de longues années, peut-être toute la vie?. Non pas pour apporter des solutions, mais avant tout pour être une simple présence d'amour. Oui, pour aimer et le dire par notre vie".
Frère Roger de Taizé
"Why living in some of those places with such conditions and stay there for long years, even the whole life?. Not to give solutions, but above all to be a simple presence of love. Yes, to love and say it with our life".
Brother Roger of Taizé
Wed 20060125
"Qué bien sé yo la fonte que mana y corre
aunque es de noche.
Aquesta eterna fonte está ascondida
en ese vivo pan por darnos vida,
aunque es de noche.
Aquesta viva fuente, que deseo,
en este pan de vida yo la veo
aunque es de noche".
San Juan de la Cruz
"So well I know that fountain which springs and runs
though it is dark
This eternal fountain is hidden
in this living bread to give us life,
though it is dark.
This living fountain, that I wish,
in this living bread I see
though it is dark".
Saint John of the Cross
Mon 20060123
* Some seven months ago my aunt showed me a big bag with plenty of little wool squares that she had been knitting for years. It didn't take her long to knit one of them. Maybe half an hour or a little longer. Each of these little squares was a small step. Relaxing, changing of activity, doing little by little but steadily. She mentioned me that she was willing to do a blanket.
* Yesterday I went to see my grandmother and my aunt with my parents. It was late; we were staying just for a little while. It was some sort of unexpected visit.
* I saw a blanket. It had all those little wool squares joined to each other. It was in the living room, where my grandmother was. My aunt was still in the kitchen talking to my mother. When my aunt joined us in the living room she excused herself for not having taken out the blanket. It was a present; a surprise for me. One of those presents that one does not receive in Christmas or on one's birthday but on an ordinary day: whenever she finished.
* About how my heart got moved when I left the house. My aunt thought that the best she could do about those wool squares was to make me a blanket.
* My grandmother mentioned that perhaps it was not very colorful, for my aunt had been using wool leftovers to do some of the squares. It was good for a guy she added at the end.
* I was thinking that the beauty of that blanket did not come from its colors but from each very knot and the love with which each one of them was knit.
Fri 20060120
"Lord, make me know your ways. Lord, teach me your paths. Make me walk in your truth, and teach me: for You are God my savior.
Remember your mercy, Lord, and the love your have shown from of old. In your love remember me, because of your goodness, O Lord.
The Lord is good and upright. He shows the path to those who stray. He guides the humble in the right path; he teaches his way to the poor".
* My dearest Lord, make me humble and poor, for those who are humble and poor listen to Your voice.
Mon 20050116
* Praying for Cxxx. My mother told me that she had big alergic reactions during her treatment.
* Praying for Sxxx. I went with her on Saturday to Ikea. About the silent return. There's nothing wrong with silence but her silence stroke me.
* About the meeting of the Commission of Religious Affairs. Meeting new people. About the mass on Sunday at the church of my old university. Meeting known people there. Spending the morning with Axxx and Cxxx.
* John 1, 35-42: "Where do you live?", asked Andrew to Jesus when Jesus turned around seeing that Andrew was following. Jesus answered: "Come and see". Let me, my dearest Lord follow You, and ask where can I find You. Let me come and see.
* About Barenboim's piano recital yesterday night.
Sun 20060108
* Christmas is over. About the things that have happened during these days. I didn't find my regular moment to be with You. Too many things, too many activities.
* I pray for Cxxx (a woman friend of my mother). I have been praying for her during the last couple of years. I start my prayer everyday saying "I pray for Cxxx". About how my heart got moved when my mother told me she was going with her for cancer therapy. I was on vacation, I could go too. About going to see Cxxx. We don't have that much relationship but she was very pleased to see me and I was very pleased to see her. She told me about her hard situation but fortunately she didn't have a depression. We talked a little about the Divine Providence. Of how she lets herself be led by this Providence. I gave her a CD with my little talk about sexual orientation and spirituality. She could not go to the talk, though she would have loved to.
* About having lunch with Sxxx yesterday. I guess she was feeling a little lonely these days. Her coming was very spontaneous. It was about a friend who invites another friend to have lunch at home. About talking of superficial and deep things all mixed together, changing from one to the other so smoothly.
* About organizing all my accounts.
* About sending the text of my little talk and the link of the blog spiritualsharing to the Commission of Religious Affairs to be put in their webpage.
* About going to see Dxxx and Axxx in Robledillo. Wishing them Merry Christmas and a happy New Year.
* About hosting the meal of the family on Kings day.
* About not praying during these days. I guess I could have enjoyed more the things I have done. Because You would have shown me your presence more clearly. I would have searched your presence more explicitly. I'm not realizing of the things that have happened until now.
Thu 20051229
* About this little text I sent to Lxxx and Mxxx.
"My son, support your mother in her old age, do not grieve her during her life. Even if her mind should fail, show her sympathy, do not despise her in your health and strength; for kindness to a mother shall not be forgotten but will serve as reparation for your sins".
Wed 20051228
* May my dearest Lord make me small, tiny and little. Let me not be proud, nor haughty, nor too ambitious. In my evaluations at work, I was told to be more aggressive, not allowing doing other's work. Sometimes it seems to me that I cannot stop doing what is urgent and I never do what I like most. Let me find a balance between both.
* Thank you for yesterday concert. It was great.
Fri 20051223
* Thank you, my dearest Lord, for a son is given to us, for dominion is laid upon his shoulder, for his name is Wonderful Counselor, Almighty God, the Everlasting Father, the Prince of Peace (Is 9, 1-7).
Mon 20051219
* May your will be done, your paths accomplished, for You know better than me, what it is best. I have been struggling to be able to deliver the recording of my little talk by email. I haven't succeeded. At least during this week, let's let it be. If it doesn't go through, let me not struggle too much. Maybe it should not be done yet.
* About the trip to Argentina. We had to cancel it for the strike in Argentinean airways. We had to change plans but it was fine. We don't need to go to Argentina. I'm sorry not to be present in the wedding I was going for. When things don't succeed, let me ask myself whether it is more convenient that they don't succeed.
* About Mary's response to the invitation of the angel for her Lord's plan: "I am the handmaid of the Lord. Let what you have said be done to me".
Fri 20051216
* About the call that Carlos Carretto received to go to the desert:: "Come with me to the desert. I don't want your action; I want your prayer, your love". "Come with me to the desert. There's something more important than you action: your prayer; there is a strength greater than your words: your love".
Thu 20051215
* I thank for the availability of the presidents of young professionals in my Jesuit group to continue one more year. It's a lot of work. There was a voting to ask them to continue one more year. Everyone voted yes. About the comments of the president in the mass after the voting. He was thanking for the support that all those voters were giving to the presidents. I thank them once more for their availability and the availability of their partners.
Sun 20051211
* "El deseo que tenemos de Dios es la antesala del encuentro con Él".
* "Our desire of God is the hall to encounter the Lord".
* May I ask to desire You, for desiring You is the hall, the previous step, before encountering You.
Thu 20051208
* About taking ownership of what is not mine but Yours. About thinking that the gifts that You give me are mine and not Yours. About thinking that the experience of encountering You is mine and not a gift from You. About this self-praising spirit coming into my mind (not my heart), praising my sharing on Monday November 28th. It does not come into my heart, for the only one who moves my heart is You, not me. There are good reasons to praise. That sharing was really great. Praise, but not to me. It's not about me. I'm only the messenger. The message is not mine but from the One who sent me, who moved my heart to share how we met, how we continue meeting, how our love for each other develops. My dearest Lord, don't allow me to take ownership of what is Yours. I want it to be Yours, for You know how to have it.
Tue 20051206
* Yesterday I sent an email to the new person who is taking care of the welcome group (Pxxx). It was not my message but Yours. I was reading a passage from Isaiah and I felt very much like sending it to this person.
Is 61, 1-2a; 10-11
"The spirit of the Lord God has been given to me, for the Lord has anointed me. He has sent me to bring good news to the poor, to bind up hearts that are broken; to proclaim liberty to captives, freedom to those in prison;
to proclaim a year of favor from the Lord, I exult for joy in the Lord, my soul rejoices in my God, for he has clothed me in the garments of salvation, he has wrapped me in the cloak of integrity, like a bridegroom wearing his wreath, like a bride adorned in her jewels.
For as the earth makes fresh things grow, as a garden makes seeds spring up, so will the Lord God make both integrity and praise spring up in the sight of the nations".
* Of how I see this person anointed by the Lord to bring good news to the poor, to bind up broken hearts through the welcome group.
Tue 20051129
* Thank you for our sharing yesterday. This is what You wanted. I'm happy to be your messenger. For Your presence invaded the mass after the sharing. For how I liked the sharing of Exxx. Something simple, hard and full of your presence.
* I feel how a stage of my life finishes and a new one starts. Thank you so much for being there in the middle.
Thu 20051124
* About my motivations for sharing my spiritual journey and encountering process with my Lord from the acceptance of my sexual orientation. About finding that feeling of self-praise, taking ownership of what is not mine, but my Lord's. My dearest Lord, don't allow me to take any profit out of this.
Fri 20051118
* My situation at work is again a little pressed. I see myself slow, unable to progress as I wanted. I find myself limited in comparison with others (let my Lord not allow me to compare myself with others, that never helped anyone).
* Thank you, my dearest Lord for maybe You wanted my heart not to be proud, not haughty my eyes. Thank you for you show me not to go after things too great, nor marvels beyond me. Thank you, my dearest Lord, for showing my limits, for not allowing me to be proud nor haughty to others. Thank you for showing me to be humble and little. For my strength is not mainly in myself but in others and in You.
Wed 20051116
* My prayer once more for Fxxx and Cxxx.
* About this readings from "Letters from the dessert" by Carlos Carretto:
" For many years I had thought of being 'somebody' in the church. I had even thought of this sacred living building as a temple sustained by many little and big columns and under each column, the shoulder of a Christian (...)
After 25 years I had realized that there was nothing leaning on my shoulders and that the column was false, fake, unreal, created by my imagination, my vanity. I had walked run, talked, organized, worked thinking that I was holding something; in reality I was holding nothing. All the weight was leaning on Christ Crucified. I was nothing, nothing at all".
Tue 20051115.
* My prayer for Fxxx. May you be with her. For she is in need of help and she is willing to listen. May she encounter You and may you comfort her. I'll chat with her on Friday.
Tue 20051108. Wisdom 12-16
"Wisdom is bright, and does not grow dim. By those who love her she is readily seen, and found by those who look for her. Quick to anticipate those who desire her, she makes herself known to them. Watch for her early and you will have no trouble. You will find her sitting at your gates".
* Thank you my Lord, for You hid your Wisdom to the wise and the learnt and you showed her to the simple. For those who love and look for your Wisdom, she makes herself known. She is waiting at their gates.
* Thank you, my dearest Lord, for the dinner at the president house. Talking about coming out and transmitting an experience of encountering with You. Thank you for their welcome. For all the last hour changes. For You chose once more that things would not be done when I wanted, in the way I preferred, with the people I chose. For it was hard to compromise a last hour change of plans due to a misunderstanding. However, I prefer thinking about the very positive reaction of Sxxx and Exxx and how they moved my heart and encouraged me to go on in spite of all changes. Thank you, for the difficulties helped me to understand your Wisdom, to think the way You think. About how my plans are not Your plans. Of how higher Yours are.
Mon 20051107
* About reading a little fragment of the presentation of "Letters in the desert" by Carlos Carretto. About the call of this person to go to the Sahara:
"Leave everything and come with me to the desert. I don't want your action, I want your prayer, your love".
"Déjalo todo y ven conmigo al desierto. No quiero tu acción, quiero tu oración, tu amor".
"Come with me to the desert. There is something greater than you action: your prayer; there is a force stronger than your word: your love".
"Ven conmigo al desierto. Hay algo más grande que tu acción: la oración; hay una fuerza más eficaz que tu palabra: el amor".
Of how these words moved me. So long concentrated in actions, activities, results. Let me talk to You without doing anything but simply spending time with You.
* About the email I sent to José Luis with these words and others.
* Thank you for the weekend, the concert on Friday, the concert on Sunday with a few friends.
Thu 20051103
Fragmentos sobre la oración del hermano Roger de Taizé.
* Déjà avant le Christ, un croyant exprimait son attente: "Mon âme t'a désiré pendant la nuit, Seigneur; au plus profond de moi, mon esprit te cherche".
Ya antes de Jesús, un creyente expresaba su espera: "Mi alma te ha deseado durante la noche, Señor, desde lo más profundo de mí, mi espíritu te busca".
* Tres siglos después de Cristo, San Agustín escribía: "un deseo que invoca a Dios es ya una oración, Si deseas rezar sin cesar, nunca dejes de desear".
* El deseo de una comunión con Dios está situado dentro del corazón humano desde tiempo inmemorial. El misterio de esta comunión toca lo más íntimo y el fondo mismo del ser.
* Habitando en el centro de alma de cada uno, Dios no tiene necesariamente un lenguaje traducible en palabras humanas. Él nos habla antes de todo mediante intuiciones silenciosas.
* Estar en la presencia de Dios en un silencio apacible, es ya orar. En ocasiones un simple suspiro puede ser una oración. Ese silencio no parece ser nada. Sin embargo, el Espíritu Santo nos puede conceder poder acoger la felicidad de Dios.
* Cuando rezamos y nada parece ocurrir, ¿Nos quedaremos sin recompensa?. No. En una confianza apacible en Dios, toda oración encuentra sus progresos. Es posible que sean diferentes a los que suponíamos ... ¿No recompensa Dios en vista de un amor aún superior?
Cuando nuestros labios se cierran
Inmutable en su fondo, la oración despierta expresiones diversas. Algunos rezan en un gran silencio. Mantenerse en silencio, en presencia de Dios con el deseo de acoger su Espíritu Santo es ya buscarle.
Los hay que se expresan con muchas palabras. Santa Teresa de Ávila escribía: "Cuando hablo con el Señor, muchas ocasiones no sé ni lo que le digo".
Otros rezan con algunas palabras solamente. Dichas lentamente o cantadas, cinco veces, diez veces, del fondo del corazón, estas palabras pueden sostener una vida en comunión con Dios. De la misma forma lo hacen breves oraciones: "Dios no puede más que dar su amor, nuestro Dios es ternura", "Mi alma se reposa en paz sobre Dios sólo".
Al rezar, buscamos expresar lo que hay más personal en nosotros. En ocasiones sube del fondo de nuestra persona una inspiración, una intuición. Pero no nos preocupemos si no nos vienen palabras. Puede haber en nosotros resistencias, opacidades, momentos en los que en la oración, nuestros labios están cerrados.
San Agustín nos recuerda: "Hay también una voz del corazón y un lenguaje del corazón ... Es esta voz interior la que constituye nuestra oración cuando nuestros labios están cerrados y nuestra alma abierta delante de Dios. Nosotros nos callamos y nuestro corazón habla; no a los oídos humanos, sino a Dios. Estad seguros: Dios sabrá escucharte".
Wed 20051102
* About visiting my grandmother yesterday. Of how happy she was of my presence. Maybe we should have waited for my aunt to come back before having dinner.
* Feeling a little anxious about work this morning. There's no real reason. It's just a feeling.
* Remembering Ixxx's mother and the family. She was operated on Monday.
Wed 20051102
* About visiting my grandmother yesterday. Of how happy she was of my presence. Maybe we should have waited for my aunt to come back before having dinner.
* Feeling a little anxious about work this m
Fri 20051028
* I have spent the whole week reading this Psalm 130. It is getting deep inside, touching my heart. About hearts not proud nor haughty eyes. Trying not to go after things too great nor marvels beyond me.
* Thinking and praying for Exxx, who leaves tomorrow to Calcuta. She will work for a month with the missionaries of charity. She has taken this month out of her vacations.
Mon 20051024
* Psalm 130
"Guard my soul in peace before you, O Lord
O Lord, my heart is not proud
nor haughty my eyes.
I have not gone after things too great
nor marvels beyond me.
Truly I have set my soul in silence and peace.
A weaned child on its mothers' breast,
even so is my soul.
O Israel, hope in the Lord
both now and for ever".
"Guarda mi alma en paz junto a ti, Oh Señor.
Oh Señor, mi corazón no es orgulloso,
ni mis ojos arrogantes.
No me he ido detrás de cosas demasiado importantes,
ni maravillas por encima de mí.
En verdad he dejado mi alma en silencio y paz.
Como un niño privado de la leche materna en los pechos de su madre,
así se encuentra mi alma.
Oh Israel, espera en el Señor
ahora y siempre".
* Thank you, my dearest Lord, for the encountering process with You does not allow my heart to be proud nor haughty my eyes. Thank you for encountering with You makes my heart simple and poor, my eyes close to others.
* My dearest Lord, thank You for letting me know You, for I don't go after things too great and I don't want marvels beyond me. Thank you for I have spent too much effort and time to pursue things which I cannot do.
* Thank You, my dearest Lord, for you set my soul in silence and peace.
Thu 20051020
* Psalm 17
"I love you, Lord, my strength,
my rock, my fortress, my savior.
My God is the rock where I take refuge;
my shield, my mighty help, my stronghold.
The Lord is worthy of all praise:
when I call I am saved from my foes".
* Thank you, my Lord, for being there. Don't allow me to get trapped into working and only thinking about work. Let me discover the beauty and simplicity of daily things, little details, your creation.
Wed 20051019
* My dearest Lord, I am feeling quite anxious at work. I'm providing all the effort, enthusiasm and patience I have. Still, things don't progress as I expected. Always too slow.
* I offer my time, work and effort to my Lord. May You do what You will with it. So that Your will be done, your paths accomplished. Let me trust You.
* About Jxxx's conference on Monday about patience. About thinking that I can only hope in the future, when all this situation is over and in the meantime I'm missing the present. All the gifts of my Lord in every moment.
* Thank you for yesterday concert. Alfred Brendel was wonderful. That allowed me to switch off.
* About going to Argentina with my aunt. She was willing so much to go. She also deserves a little rest. She takes care of my grandmother all time.
* Thank you very much for my ear is fine. For I don't hear anymore those distorted sounds. For this is probably the most important thing that should worry me.
Mon 20051017
* Thank you for the conversation I had yesterday with Sxxx and Exxx. They clarified me a lot to continue with the talk to share my spiritual journey as a gay person. The group prefers them not to be part of that talk. I thank them for they were not angry but available to offer their sharing in the future.
Thu 20051013
* "Déjà avant le Christ, un croyant exprimait son attente: 'Mon âme t'a désiré pendant la nuit, mon esprit te cherche' "
* Already before Christ, a believer expressed his hope: 'My soul has desired you at night, my spirit searches you'.
* "Un désir qui appelle Dieu est déjà une prière. Si tu veux prier sans cesse, ne cesse jammais de désirer ...".
posted by Loyola at 2:58 PM
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