Tuesday, October 11, 2005

Spiritual Sharing October 2005

Tue 20051011

* Thanks for yesterday meeting of the former welcome group. It was raining heavily. We were just a few, but we programmed the meetings up to Christmas. Thanks for the sharing in the second hour.

Tue 20051004

* My prayer for Vxxx and the whole family. Yesterday I realised that I had met her and her son who died a few months ago doing scuba diving. I saw the picture of her son in the funeral's panflet that my mother gave to me. I didn't know him much, but enough to be somehow affected.

* My prayer for Vxxx. For she must be devastated. For the rest of the family. May the presence of my dearest Lord be with them and may something good and positive be taken out of this horrible situation. May they encounter You and receive your sympathy and closeness.

* Isaiah 25,6-10a:

"On this mountain, the Lord of hosts will prepare for all peoples a banquet of rich food, a banquet of fine wines, of food rich and juicy, of strained wines. On this mountain he will remove the mourning veil covering all peoples, and the shroud enwrapping all nations, he will destroy death for ever. The Lord God will wipe away the tears from every cheek; he will take away his peoples's shame everywhere on earth, for the Lord has said so".

Wed 20050928

* Philipians 4, 6-9: "There is no need to worry; but if there is anything you need, pray for it, asking God for it with prayer and thanksgiving, and that peace of God, which is so much greater than we can understand, will guard your hearts and your thoughts, in Christ Jesus".

* About taking off a little of my pressured work situation. About the thoughts that kept me awake last night. I don't like to waste time and I don't like to make others waste time. The consequence of this attitude is that it is clear that I'm behind in my work. However, if I make others waste time, that allows me not to appear so behind. The current situation fosters inefficiency, especially when pressure is present. Everyone tries to make others waste time to have some more extra time to do the job.

* Thanks, my dearest Lord, for we chose not make others waste time, though others make me waste time and all that makes me appear as I'm behind in my schedule. Thank you, for that's our choice.

Tue 20050927

* "Longtemp avant le Christ, un croyant addressait cette invitation: 'Quitte ta tristesse, laisse Dieu te conduire vers une joie'. "

* Long time before Christ, a believer addressed this invitation: 'Abandon your sadness, let God lead you towards happiness'.

* "Jésus le Christ, Lumière interieure, ne laisse pas mes ténèbres me parler!. (Saint Agustin).

* Christ Jesus, internal light, don't let my obscurities talk to me!.

Mon 20050926. Notes from the last book of brother Roger from Taizé, published a few months before being murdered.

* "Pour qu'une vie soit belle, il n'est pas indispensable d'avoir des capacités exceptionnelles ou de grandes facilités: il y a un bonheur dans le don de soi-même".

* For a life to be happy, it's not necessary to have exceptional qualities or great skills: there's a welfare in the gift of oneself.

* "Ce qui rend heureuse une existence, c'est d'avancer vers la simplicité: celle de notre coeur, et celle de notre vie".

* What makes an existence happy is to progress towards simplicity: that of our heart, and that of our life.

* "Quand la simplicité est intimement associé à la bonté du coeur, un être humain peut créer un terrain d'espérance autour de lui".

* When simplicity is intimately associated with the goodness of heart, a human being can create around him/her a frame of hope.

* My dearest Lord, of how this three little comments from the first page of the book impressed me. I agree that they have a major key for happiness.

* About this busy weekend, the meeting with the Comission of Religious Affairs all Saturday through, about having lunch my grandma and aunt.

* Let my Lord make me simple. For simplicity is the key of happiness.

Tue 20050920

* Psalm 24, 4-9

"Lord, make me know your ways.
Lord, teach me your paths.
Make me walk in your truth, and teach me:
for you are God my saviour
Remember your mercy, Lord
and the love you have shown from of old.
Do not remember the sins of my youth.
In your love remember me,
because of your goodness, O Lord.
The Lord is good and upright.
He shows the path to those who stray,
he guides the humble in the right path;
he teaches his way to the poor".

* My dearest Lord, make me know your ways, teach me your paths. For they are so much more sensible and higher than mine. There are plenty of things that I cannot understand. Let me just trust You. You lead, I continue trying to follow.

* Let me be humble and poor, for otherwise I won't listen. You guide the humble in the right path; you teach your way to the poor.

* About remembering the Taizé song: "Jesus remember me, when you come into your kingdom".

Mon 20050919

* Thank you my Lord for the group of people with which I had dinner on Saturday. Thank you for the presence of Jxxx and Lxxx. Thank you for the comments of Axxx. They helped me to understand Gxxx. On Saturday I was a little bothered. I was thinking about what I was saying on Sunday. After the dinner and the conversation I felt peaceful. Thank you for You always take care of me. The conversation on Sunday was very smooth and loving.

Thu 20050915

* Feeling pressed at work. Maybe it's simply about me. I may have to work over the weekend. Let me progressively move on.

* About the organization meeting of the welcome group with the presidents yesterday. I saw them very enthusiastic for the starting year. Thank you for they encountered You last year and it was a great pleasure to contemplate it.

Wed 20050914

* About the workers in the vineyard (Matthew 20,1-6). Let me enjoy working with the other people under the direction of the owner of the vine. Let me not care much about the wage at the end of the day.

* About working in the vineyard as the everyday life. About having dinner with my parents yesterday. They were very much willing to see me. About visiting my grandmother and my aunt, having a little snack with Sxxx on Sunday. About sometimes the hard work or the long work. That's a good part of working in the vineyard.

* Thank you for Ixxx is planning to leave Garrigues to have more time for others and for herself.

Tue 20050913

* Isaiah 55,6-9

" Seek the Lord while he is still to be found, call to him while he is still near. Let the wicked man abandon his way, the evil man his thoughts. Let him turn back to the Lord who will take pity on him, to our God who is rich in forgiving; for my thoughts are not your thoughts, my ways not your ways (it is the Lord who speaks). Yes, the heavens are as high above earth as my ways are above your ways, my thoughts above your thoughts".

* Thank you, my dearest Lord, once more, for your ways are above mine. Thank you, for you lead me though your ways, for you taught me how to trust. For your ways and your criterion are so much better than mine.

* My dear Lord, I am tired. It seems that my efforts at work don't follow as quickly as I would want. It seems to me that I'm slow and that I'm missing interesting things for not having enough time. Let me never loose a good mood even if I'm tired or discouraged.

Thu 20050809 (continued)

El que allí llega de vero,
de sí mismo desfallece;
cuanto sabía primero
mucho bajo le paresce;
y su sciencia tanto cresce,
que se quede no sabiendo,
toda sciencia trascendiendo

Cuanto más alto se sube,
tanto menos entendía
que es la tenebrosa nube
que a la noche esclarecía;
por eso quien la sabía
queda siempre no sabiendo,
toda sciencia transcendiendo.

Este saber no sabiendo
es de tan alto poder,
que los sabios arguyendo
jamás le pueden vencer:
que no llega su saber
a no entender entendiendo,
toda sciencia trascendiendo.

* Thank you, my Lord, for you have hidden your internal knowledge to the wise and the learnt and you have revealed yourself to the simple and little.

Y es de tan alta excelencia
aqueste sumo saber,
que no hay faculad ni sciencia
que le puedan emprender;
quien se supiere vencer
con un no saber sabiendo,
irá siempre trascendiendo.

Y si lo queréis oír,
consiste esta suma sciencia
en un subido sentir
de la divina Esencia:
es obra de su clemencia
hacer quedar no entendiendo,
toda sciencia transcendiendo.

And if you want to hear it,
this highest science consists
of an exalted feeling
of the divine Essence:
it is the work of his clemency
to leave us without knowing
all science overflowing.

* Thank you for you reveal yourself through an exalted feeling of your divine essence. Thank you for this is the work of your compassion and you chose to reveal it to us.

* Thank you, my dearest Lord, for the encountering process with you is not about having bright ideas that we can say to others, but about deep feelings of Your divine essence which leave us in silence, wordless, clueless, understanding without knowing, full of peace. Thank you for this is the work of your clemence and sympathy and you give it to us freely.

Thu 20050809

*
"Entréme donde no supe,
y quedéme no sabiendo,
toda sciencia trancendiendo.

I entered where I knew not,
and stayed without knowing,
all science overflowing

Yo no supe dónde entraba,
pero, cuando allí me vi,
sin saber dónde estaba,
grandes cosas entendí;
no diré lo que sentí
que me quedé no sabiendo,
toda sciencia trancendiendo.

I did not know where I entered,
but, when there I saw me,
without knowing where I was,
great things I understood;
I won't tell what I felt
that I stayed without knowing
all science overflowing.

De paz y de piedad
era la sciencia perfecta,
en profunda soledad,
entendida vía recta;
era cosa tan secreta,
que me quedé balbuciendo
toda sciencia trancendiendo

Of peace and pity
science perfect was,
in deep loneliness,
well straight way it was;
it was such a secret thing,
that hardly speaking could I stay
science all trancended was.

Estaba tan embebido,
tan absorto y ajenado
que se quedó mi sentido
de todo sentir privado;
I was so embedded ,
so adsorted, so bewildered
that all my sences
stopped to feel.

y el espíritu dotado
de un entender no entendiendo
toda sciencia trascendiendo".
and the spirit abled
of undestanding without knowing
all science overflowing.

San Juan de la Cruz.

Tue 20050906

* Feeling a little estrange this morning. I guess a little touched by this week in Taizé. Feeling a little unsecure. There's no reason for that. I just feel like that.

* My prayer for Axxx and father Bxxx, near the disaster in New Orleans. My prayer for all those people who died in Irak after the panic after a false terrorist attack.

Mon 20050905

* Feeling a little nostalgic when I left early this morning the whole group and I went to work. Thank you for this week. You continue sending me your messages. Thank You for giving me the sensitivity to listen. Thank You once more for showing me who You are. I thank this whole group of people and especially these two germans for they became your instruments to send your message.

* Contemplating once more single images of those intense moments from last week. May You lead, may I follow. For You showed me once more how good leader You are.

Sun 20050904

* When singing for the first time in a choir, I felt so much how the sonorities of the voices impress me. When one starts something for the first time, the intensity is higher and I can see now how aloud I must have been singing.

* Of how I realised how aloud I was singing. On Saturday Sxxx brought to the choir one of the boys he was taking care of to join us. At the end of the prayer, we continued singing. Sxxx left but the german boy stayed. I was loosing my reference and I thought that this boy would never give me the right tone. However, I joined him and we sang together.

* Of how this boy was singing. Much softer but giving the exact tone and tempo. His singing was so much more delicate and deep. Of how I realised how aloud I was singing before and how his deep and soft singing integrated so much better into the whole choir. Of how impressed me his quiet attitude.

* I like so much that it was precisely this boy the one who made me realize that I was singing too aloud. He was not trying to teach me, he simply showed himself the way he was.

* Thank you so much my dearest Lord, for this is the way in which You tell Your messages. And I thank you even more because the messenger was this boy, who I was somehow undervaluing.

* I told this boy the following day how he showed me that I was singing too aloud.

Sat 20050903 (continuation)

* On Friday, after the evening prayer there was the adoration of the cross. It was crowded. I asked Sxxx whether he was willing to adore the cross. He told me that he was meeting a group of friends some half an hour later. I was not sure whether to adore the cross myself.

* Sxxx left to take care of a group of kids he was leading during the week in Taizé. I said goodbye. I stayed there a little longer. I could not sing the part of the tenor because now he was not there and I was getting lost.

* I thought of leaving but before doing it he was back and joined me to contine singing. He pointed out her girlfriend and one of those kids he was working with during the week. They had followed him to the church. He mentioned to me that they were laughing at him because he was getting back to the church. However, they stayed nearby with us.

* About singing together for about another 45 minutes. We were a single voice now. I folllowed, he led. About how much the sonority of the music invaded me. Of how the music and the lyrics moved my heart:

"Jesus remember me, when You come into your Kingdom".

"Wait for the Lord, whose day is near. Wait for the Lord: keep watch, take heart!".

"Stay with me, stay here with me, watch and pray"

"Bleibet hier und wachet mit mir. Wachet und betet, wachet und betet".

* I felt how my Lord started to lead as Sxxx was leading me with his singing. Of how Sxxx was yawning (he must have been quite tired). Of how much I was thanking him for being there to lead my singing.

* Thank you my dearest Lord for you became the leader. I felt very much like adoring the cross of my so dearest Lord. I invited Sxxx to come with me but he refused. I went on my own.

* My prayer when arriving at the cross:

"Thank you my dearest Lord, thank you, thank you very much, thank you so much, for You chose this very way of giving You (death on a cross) to teach me how to love".

"Gracias, mi Señor, Gracias, muchas gracias, muchísimas gracias, tantísimas gracias porque elegiste esta forma de entregarte (muriendo en una cruz) para enseñarme a amar".

"Merci, mon très cher Seigneur, merci, merci beaucoup, merci tellement, parce que tu a choisit cette façon de te donner (mort sûr un croix) pour m'enseigner à aimer".

* After adoring the cross I stayed about another hour. Sxxx had left but I it was fine like this. My Lord was leading now and the music was not sounding from my ear to my heart but truely inside my heart. I thank my Lord for making me undestarnd of his ways. Because they are so much higher than mine. Thank you to Sxxx for he probably didn't realise of how he was becoming the instrument of my Lord to bring me with Him. Thank you my Lord, for you send the right people at the right time to tell us who You are. Thank you for telling me once more who You are. Thank you so much for being just like You are.

* Of what I was thinking of telling Sxxx the next time I saw him: "Danke sehr schön, es hat viel zu mir bedeutet dass du gestern zur Kirche zurrück gekommen bist und mit mir gesungen hast".

Sat 20050903

* I am in Taizé (France) in an ecumenical center led by a group of brothers (they are not priests). They are known by their prayer songs, sung in different languages and from different traditions (not only catholic). The 90 year old prior brother of the community was murdered three weeks ago. I was not planning to come but I thought that it could be a good occasion. I decided to come in spite of having a lot of work because I'm sure that in a year time I will not remember about my work but I'm sure that I will remember this week in Taizé.

* I was joining the rehersal of the choir every day. I met there a german guy (Sxxx) who knew how to sing (I didn't). When I was singing near him I could hear his tenor part and I was able to follow him. I could see how my voice joined his and the others being just one thing. Of how much the sonority of singing in a choir impressed me, hearing how the voices join together. My dearest Lord, it is amazing. About the lyrics that we were singing and how they were moving me.

* Of how I wanted Sxxx to sit beside me and sing with me (without him I was unable to sing the tenor part). I told him that his was my reference but I never asked him to sit beside me.

Thu 20050831

Philippiens 2, 1-4

"Je vous en conjure par tout ce qu'il peut y avoir d'appel pressant dans le Christ, de persuasion dans l'amour, de communion dans l'Esprit, de tendresse compatissante, mettez le comble á ma joie par l'accord de vos sentiments: ayez le même amour, une seulte âme, un seul sentiment; n'accordez rien á l'esprit de parti, rien á la vaine gloire, maisque chacun par l'humilité estime les autres supérieurs á soi; ne recherchez pas chacun vos propres intérêts, mais plutôt que chacun conge á ceux des autres".

"If then there is any encouragement in Christ, any consolation from love, any sharing in the Spirit, any compassion and sympathy, make my joy complete: be of the same mind, having the same love, being in full accord and of one mind. Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility regard others as better than yourselves. Let each of you look not to your own interest, but to the interests of others".

Sat 20050828

Rm 12,1-2

"Au nom de cette immense tendresse que Dieu a manifesté pour vous, je vous exhorte à faire de vos personnnes une offrande sainte et que lui plaise; c'est là le culte que vous lui devez, l'adoration véritable. Ne prenez pas modèle sur le monde présent, laissez Dieu vous transformer par un renouvellement complet de votre façon de penser; vous saurez alors reconnaître sa volonté, ce qui est bon, ce que lui plaît, ce qui est parfait".

* Don't take the model of the present people. Let God transform you by a total renewal of your way of thinking. Then you will know how to recognize his will, what is good, what pleases to God, what is perfect.

* My dearest Lord, thinking of why I can manage the opposition of the church against gay people. I don't take the model of the people. I simply ask my Lord to transform me, renewing completely my way of thinking. My dearest Lord, you are doing this in me. Then I will know how to recognize Your will, what is good, what pleases you, what is perfect. I know, my deares Lord, who I am trusting. For you told me who you are. For you keep telling me who you are. Thank you my dearest Lord, for you told me, me alone, intimately, quietly, through those simple little things of daily life who You are. And You have never deceived me.

Wed 20050824

* My prayer for Sxxx. She got fired a few weeks ago. For she deserves a better job. May she may find the job she's been deserving since a long time ago. Let her continue trusting in You.

* Psam 62: "For you have been my help; in the shadow of your wings I rejoice. My soul clings to you; your right hand hold me fast".