Spiritual Sharing April 2004

Fri, 4/2/04: Continuation of 3 phases of humility.

* Let me desire to find you, to follow you and to love you.

* "He was despised, rejected, a man of sorrows and acquainted with grief".

* The second phase of humility is not about obedience. It is about love. I follow not out of obedience but out of love.

Thu, 4/1/04: The three phases of humility.

* The humble embraces having to depend entirely on God, and delights in that. She doesn't demand to control everything in life. She deals with life as a surprising series of gifts.

* I do not determine which of my desires leads to my authentic life and deep happiness.

Wed, 3/31/04. The beatitudes. Mt 4,23-5,12

* Happy are those who have the spirit of the poor.

* Happy are the gentle.

* Happy are those with a pure heart, because they shall see God.

Tue, 3/30/04. Repetition.

* Prayer for Mxxx Rxxx and Sxxx Sxxx.

* "The Spirit of the Lord is upon me. He has anointed me to bring good news to the poor, to proclaim liberty to captives and new sight to the blind; to free the oppressed and announce the Lord's year of mercy".

Mon, 3/29/04. Lc 4,14-22. "The spirit of the Lord has been given to me".

* Let me get to know you.

* 7th by Bruckner. How happy I am that Mxxx was with me.

* Email sent to Mxxx: "The spirit of the Lord is upon you. He has anointed you to bring good news to the poor..."

20th week: EE 2nd week 8

Fri, 3/26/04. Jn 2, 1-11. Marriage party in Cana.

* Thy will be done.

* The way mums ask.

* There's somebody at work. People come and tell me that I kept the best wine till the end.

Thu, 3/25/04. Three types of men.

* Thy will be done. The way you want, not the way I want. Whatever you want. Let me know, that I have done your will.

Wed, 3/24/04. Mc 1,16-20. Jesus calls his disciples.

* John is arrested (after sending his own disciples with Jesus).

* Make me indifferent.

* May I follow you as quickly as your disciples.

Tue, 3/23/04. Repetition

* My Lord, where are you staying?.

* Let me be your messenger, even if I stay all on my own. Be with me. Don't let me be alone.

Mon, 3/22/04. Jn 1,38-42.

* Make me small in Bruno Leonardo Gelber's concert.

* John does not want to keep his disciples. "There is the Lamb of God", and his disciples followed Jesus.

Connection with Mxxx.

19th week: EE 2nd week 7

Fri, 3/19/04: Lc 2,39-40; 51-52.

* Pilate's stations of the Cross.

* Make me small, tiny.

Thu, 3/18/04: Repetition

* Make me tiny, small, out of the center of attention. Make me enjoy the second tier.

* Fortunate are those who have the spirit of the poor. Fortunate are the gentle.

Wed, 3/17/04: temptations of Jesus (Mt 3,13-17)

* Don't allow me to get away of you in temptation.

Tue, 3/16/04: Repetition

* Don't allow me to have destructive thoughts to others, because I need to be loved. I need someone "perfect" who can love me always, under any circumstances. That one is you, my Lord.

Mon, 3/15/04: Baptism of Jesus (Mt 3,13-17)

* Jesus is given the opportunity to be at the center (it is you who should baptize me). He refuses, in order to be one among many others.

18th week: EE 2nd week 6

Fri, 3/12/04: Meditation of two flags.

* The good Samaritan. He was moved with compassion.

Thu, 3/11/04: Meditation of two flags.

* Foxes have houses and birds nests, but the son of man does not have anywhere to bend his head.

* I am looking for my Lord, but I don't know where they have put him.

* The Lord chooses a humble, beautiful graceful place to stay.

* The narrow door.

Wed, 3/10/04: Meditation of two flags.

* My Lord's settlement: a humble, simple and beautiful place. His sermon to his servants and FRIENDS. Help and teach people to be poor, simple, small. Teach them to accept disdain from the world and to be humble.

Tue, 3/9/04: Meditation of two flags.

* My Lord wants me to be under his flag.

* Lucifer settlement: power, fame, money, admiration from anyone, fear. Sermon: throw nets and chains. Conquer people offering wealth, fame and highness: the world's empty honor.

Mon, 3/8/04: Meditation of two flags.

* Film Latter days. "Don't throw the flowers out. They are still alive" (an aids sick's comment).

* In which state does your Divine majesty wants me to serve?.

* Tell me so that I can know what true life is all about. To better follow you.

17th week: EE 3rd week 5

Fri, 3/5/04: Repetition

Thu, 3/4/04: About recognizing the Lord. Jn 20,11-19

* "Lord, if you have taken him away' tell me where you have put him, and I will go and remove him".

* "Mary" (she recognizes him). "Master".

Wed, 3/3/04:

* Even the Son of God, He went with her, la Magdalena (song Sabina & Milanés). With a heart so "five stars".

* Why are you weeping?. I am looking for my Lord and I don't know where they have put Him (la Magdalena).

Tue, 3/2/04: Repetition

* May your Holy Spirit move me to encounter the baby Jesus, like Simeon.

* May I recognize the baby Jesus and be full of joy.

Mon, 3/1/04: Lc 2,22-38: Jesus is presented to the temple.

* Get to know you, for the way you chose to be born. Among shepherds, in a cave, among animals.

* How Simeon is brought to encounter Jesus by the Holy Spirit.

* Simeon & Ana recognized the Lord

16th week: EE 3rd week 4

Thu, 2/26/04:

* Contemplation of the "Idiot" again.

Wed, 2/25/04:

* Contemplation of the "Idiot". How he deals with children. In two hours of acquaintance, they trust you. What did you tell them?.

* Contemplation of Marie surrounded by children when she was dying. The children saying: "nous t'aimons, Marie". She died happily because she was surrounded by children telling her how they loved her. They kissed and hugged her. They brought her food and clothes.

Tue, 2/24/04. Repetition

* Internal knowledge of Jesus, not for what he says, but for how he chose to be born, the people he wanted to be with him (shepherds, foreigners).

* Take the child Jesus in my arms.

* Bad smell in the cave.

Mon, 2/23/04. The birth of Jesus.

* About the person lying on the elevator floor, that I brought home.

15th week: EE 3rd week 3

Fri, 2/20/04: Flp 2,6-11

* Though being divine in nature, he emptied himself, taking on the nature of a servant. He humbled himself by being obedient to death, death on a cross.

Thu, 2/19/04: Repetition

* Contemplation of Jesus hugging me from behind as in Dennis' statue.

Wed, 2/18/04: The annunciation

* Rejoice, the Lord is with you.

* The Lord has looked kindly on you.

* What are your plans for me?.

Tue, 2/17/04: The incarnation (repetition).

* I want a deep and intimate knowledge of Jesus. I want a strong love for Him. I want to follow where He goes.

* He was moved by the contemplation of our distress and came down to encounter us.

* Contemplation of Jxxx Mxxx Mxxx (simplicity).

Mon, 2/16/09: The incarnation

* Don't allow me, my Lord, to fill my thoughts with sadness and loneliness. They don't help me. I have not reasons to be sad.

* "The harvest is big but the workers are few. Please, ask the owner to send more workers to harvest".

* "For God has looked kindly on you".

14th week: EE 2st week 2

Fri, 2/13/04: Hb 2,5-10

* May you tell me who you are. May I love you. May I be right there, working with you.

* A master who "is not ashamed of calling us brothers and sisters". I am his child.

* "For a while you place Him a little lower than the angels". A master who encounters me in the same level.

Thu, 2/12/04: Ef 1,3-14

* I do my offering with your favor and help.

* My will is to unite, when the fullness of time had come, everything in heaven and on earth.

* To be your greatest service and praise, to imitate you in all poverty, if you will receive me in this state of life.

Wed, 2/11/04: The Kingdom.

Tue, 2/10/04. The Kingdom.

* My will is to conquer the world for happiness and love.

* Frodo is my temporal king.

* May you Lord accept me carrying you, taking care of you. May you Lord accept that you need me as so much I need you.

Mon, 2/9/04.

* May you, my Lord, tell me who you are. May I listen to you.

* May I love you, my Lord. May I follow you.

* Don't allow me, my Lord, to be deaf to your call, but swift and diligent to follow your will.

13th week: EE 2st week 1

Fri, 02/06/04:

* Make me little & humble so that if I boast on something, be it to have met you.

Thu, 02/05/04: Repetition.

* A look of love to the hidden tasks, to the last places, to the non acknowledged honor (Frodo), to the quiet work in the obscurity, to the love which seeks more to love than to show off, to the little things, the small details, to those things done without noise and publicity.

Wed, 02/04/04: Praying about my own death. Repetition.

* Old prayer asking the Lord to make me small and little.

* Thinking about my own death as a mechanism to ask for love when I need to be loved.

Tu, 02/03/04: Repetition. Is 43, 1-7.

* Frodo's attitudes.

* Pity for Cxxx. leaving half a muffing and throwing it to the trash.

Mon, 02/02/04: summary of previous 3 weeks & triple colloquy.

* Ordering food for Greenwich pizza.

* End of Halloween party.

* Playing the piano in Jxxx’s house (I don't want to be the queen bee).

12th week: EE 1st week 4

Fri, 01/30/04: Repetition. Praying about my own death.

* About the pieces of music I sent to Lxxx Pxxx.

Thu, 01/29/04: a meditation of my own death.

* If I were to die, I would have not wished to do anything different of what I am doing right now.

* The day I die, I will take with me all what I am and all what I have given, and I will leave everything I have.

* I feel very peaceful facing the idea of dying. The Lord would be with me.

Wed, 01/28/04: On my sins, I weigh them, take up the triple colloquy.

* Sorrow for having missed the opportunity of being more fully in the presence of my Lord.

* Thoughts in which I want to be more than others. Because I need their acknowledgement (their being admired at me).

* Contemplation of the world around me. Feeling of pity for the hollowness of many people's intentions, superficiality, absence of solidarity. Pity of my own.

Tu, 01/27/04: On the sin of one person leading to the triple colloquy.

* 2 Sm 11,1-16: "the men of Israel are housed in tents while my lord Joab and his servants encamped in the open country. Shall I go to my house to eat and drink there and sleep with my wife?. As you live, I will not do this". David's sin.

* If I am to avoid sin, let me love you so that anything but serving you will be a loss, an unworthy task.

Mo, 01/26/04: On the sin of the angels & our first parents, leading to the Triple colloquy.

* May the Lord's love appeal me in such a way, that my own self cannot have a chance of looking for its own interest.

* Contemplation of Frodo's lack of fame or honour.

* Mary, what did the Lord do so that you got so close to him?. Let me leave the Lord do in me, what He did in you.

* Contemplation of the world values. Realize with a deep feeling that I am not interested.

11th week

Fri, 1/23/04: I stand before God and all creation

* Think of Frodo. He never and wanted to kill his enemies. He's not the famous one. Not the well known.

* Contemplation of how creation does not respond according to my sins. It still returns good for my wrong doing. All the blessings of creation are given to me no matter what I do.

* What can separate me from your love.

Thu, 1/22/04: Repetition. Lc 9,25

* The important thing here is not me (my sins or how good or bad I am), but my Lord. I am so much less willing to be the center of attention than some years ago.

Wed, 1/21/04: On my sins, I weigh on them

* To be over the others. Be the center of attention. In my own thoughts. Don't allow me to think of how I get over the others. To be in the clouds.

* I didn't finish my report because I stayed too long on line.

* Thanks a lot for all you have given to me. The last place rather than the first.

* Enjoy being "hidden", the obscure jobs.

Tu, 1/20/04: Repetition. Jn 21, 17ss

* Of how the internet is not helping always to me. See that the people I see are there, because I watch them. All the unfair situations created are because in the very end I watch.

* "Do you love me?. Yes, you know everything, you know that I love you".

Mon, 1/19/04: On my sins, I remember them.

* The sin of omission. Of not being sensitive enough to other's feelings. Not being with mum when dad was operated.

* About playing the piano in Jxxx’s house. The difference between being the center of attention or being just there playing for the people.

* Turning upside down the three questions of the 1/4 of the first week: what has Christ done for me?, what is He doing for me?, what will He do for me?.

* Hell is the situation in which God cannot recognize his own creature.

10th week

Fri, 1/16/04: A meditation on Hell

* I don't want to be without you. You've always been with me. Be with me always.

Thu, 1/15/04:The sin of one person

* There is a big chasm between "Lazarus" and the rich man (Lc 16, 19-31). Even if somebody rises from the dead, his brothers won't listen (the chasm).

* I don't know where all sinners are after death.

* Feel pity for those who don't want to be part of Your project and of myself when I am not part of Your project.

* I am moved to love you, because I still see people who return good for bad. When I contemplate how you deal with so much hatred and wretchness.

Wed, 1/14/04: The Sin of Adam & Eve

* The story of how mum broke the cycle of hatred with Pxxx (Mxxx's husband).

* My wrong doing does not only affect me. It spreads around me and highly contributes to the wrong doing of others. The only way to stop the vicious cycle of hatred and sin is to return good for bad. This is only possible through the Lord.

* Wrong doing propagates through the whole world (original sin).

Tu, 1/13/04: The Sin of the Angels

* Most of the suffering in the world is a consequence of sin.

* Contemplation of Christ on the cross. The important thing is not me (what I do or I don't do) but Him, what he has done, does and will do for me.

* I describe myself in the context of religion as somebody who has been touched in his heart and is being conquered by the Lord.

* I just can be a messenger of the Lord. That's the only way I can contribute to His project.

Mon, 1/12/04: The Sin of the Angels

* Lc 10, 21ss: I praise you, Father, for you have hidden these things from the wise and learned, and made them known to the little ones.

9th week

Fri, 1/9/04: Lc 15,11ss (prodigal son)

* His father was so deeply moved with compassion that he ran out to meet him.

Thu, 1/8/04: Dt 30, 15-20

* Choose life. I set before you life and good, evil and death. Please, choose life. Follow God's ways.

Wed, 1/7/04: Jn 1,1-18

* John was not the light but a witness to introduce the light. A light that darkness cannot overcome.

* And the word was made flesh, he had his tent pitched among us. He wants to be my brother, he wants me to be God's child.

Tu, 1/6/04: Hb 2,5-13

* With Christ vs without Christ.

* What do I have that you still my friendship search?.

* What does God see in us, when He looks at humankind?.

Mon, 1/5/04: Rm 7, 14-25

* Reconciliation with Bxxx & Jxxx Lxxx.

* Be present in my family.

* Looking for jobs.

* The law with Christ vs the law without Christ. The law without Christ makes humans divided.

* I have decided on behalf of Mxxx (Jxxx).

8th week

Fri, 12/19/03: Poems of Tiébissou

* Dedicated to Axxx. Even if I don't know you. Thank you for existing and break my soul with thoughts.

Thu, 12/18/03:

* Principle & Foundation. This time thinking of Axxx.

* Letter of Jxxx Mxxx Mxxx from Tiébissou.

Wed, 12/17/03: Jn 1, 1-18

* Thanks for pitching your tend among us. For showing us who the father is. Emmanuel (God with us).

* He comes after me, but he is already ahead of me, for He was before me

Tu, 12/16/03:

* What would be my life without you and the simple little things?.

Mo, 12/15/03:

* I do what I hate and I can't do what I love most (Wi-fi card).

7th Week

12/12/03:

* He has predestined me to be like his Son, so that he may be the Firstborn among many brothers & sisters.

12/11/03: Is

* "Whom shall I send?". Here I am. If that's what you will, let me well know. I need you to tell me.

12/10/03: The sacrifice of Isaac

* Abraham named the place "The Lord will provide".

* Thought when I gave Mxxx away. How I felt and how He provided. What was left for me was the knowledge of having done His will.

* Dinner with Axxx.

12/9/03: The way things can be.

* Things that are helping: the train to Greenwich, the walks,

* Indiference against having a partner.

* Come to me all of you who are tired that I will give you rest (Mesiah).

12/8/03: Ef 2,1-10

* What would be my life without my Lord?.

* Gifts of the Lord. They are His work. They are not mine. Thanks for them.

6th Week (look up)

11/10/03: Lc 11, 1-11

* Teach us to pray

* Thy will be done

* I have a friend and I have nothing to offer. How much more then will the Father in heaven give holy spirit to those who ask him.

11/11/03: Psalm 139

* From front to back you hedge me round, shielding me with your protecting hand.

11/12/03: Prayer on my dossier

* My mum is well, dad's cancer, God's will to bring me to New York, Kxxx’s prayer, parish homily, EDF results turning upside down, Tiébissou, Bolivia, last place rather than first, the simple little things, "Tomad Señor y recibid".

3rd & 4th week

11/17/03:

* "The Spirit of the Lord is upon me. He has anointed me to bring good news to the poor".

11/18/03:

* Same phase as previous day. How the Lord has recreated me over the last couple of years. I manifest God's power at work.

11/19/03:

* Principle & Foundation. Simple little things: send fall leaves to mum, Exxx's father, dinner at Exxx's, letter for Pxxx, calling home to see how's mum doing.

11/20/03:

* Os 11, 1-4. The objective of the meeting. My intention with the Divine Providence meeting is to realize among all of us that it is the Lord who is talking care of us.

11/21/03:

* Psalm 103: thanks for everything.

11/24/03:

* Hosea: cords of human kindness & leading strings of love.

11/25/03:

* Is

11/26/03:

* Things that are helping me be happy: this exercises, the people I have met, the music, swimming, reading, talking to my family through the phone, retreats, saying hello everyday, walking to work, giving thanks to my Lord, Wednesday night group.

11/27/03:

* Mxxx's reading.

11/28/03:

* Psalm 103: Bless the Lord, my soul; all my being.

5th week

12/1/03:

* The Lord has planted deep desires of Him in my heart.

* Being a messenger, forward God's message to others.

* Give me your love and grace, that's all I need (I felt a little lonely on Sunday).

* Prayer of generosity. The only thing left for me is the knowledge that I have done your will. That's enough. That's plenty.

12/2/03:

* The Lord is conquering me. He has planted big desires for Him in my heart.

* Kxxx's prayer. I prayed it for Mxxx.

12/3/03: 2Co 5,14-18

* Jesus died so that those who live may no longer live for themselves. A new creature. A new world. The work of my Lord. The reason why I love my Lord (St Teresa's poem, the workers of the vine).

12/4/03:

* Principle & Foundation. The comment of Will came to me. The Lord's wraith and punishment. I looked at my Lord and I was unable to think that He was willing to "punish" me.

12/5/03: Rm 8, 26-27

* Childrens of God. Brothers and sisters in God.

* "I belive more in God's faithfulness than my lack of faith" (Mxxx).

* We are weak but the spirit comes to help.